Big Star – "Don't Lie to Me" (1972)

I know where you’ve been

And I know what you’ve been doing

Don't lie to me!

A few years ago, I was refereeing a 6th-grade boys’ basketball game.  One of the players dribbled the ball off his foot and out of bounds – or so I thought.  

But after I made the call, the opponent who was guarding the dribbler told me that the ball had actually gone off his foot.

I reversed my call based on the defender’s admission.  And after the game was over, I went over to his coach and told him that I hoped he wouldn’t criticize his playing for telling the truth.

They’ll learn to cheat in a few years

I doubt that a 10th-grader or even an 8th-grader would have corrected my call.  At some point, boys (and girls) learn that it’s more important to win than to be honest and a good sport.

They learn that because coaches (and parents) teach them that.

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In a recent game, New York Mets 3B Todd Frazier dove into the Dodger Stadium seats in an attempt to catch a foul pop hit by Los Angeles Dodger Alex Verdugo.  

Todd Frazier goes ass over teakettle
 in pursuit of a foul pop

At first glance, it appeared that Frazier had caught the ball, and the umpire called Verdugo out.  But appearances can be deceiving.

Steve Gelbs of SportsNet New York, the Mets’ TV affiliate, reveals what actually happened on the play in this video:

Frazier is guilty of two distinct acts of deception here.

First, after dropping the ball when he fell into the stands, he picked up a ball and showed it to the umpire – in essence, he was telling the umpire, “I caught the ball!  Here it is!”

Second, when he realized that the ball in his glove was not the official MLB ball that Verdugo had hit but an unofficial ball brought to the game by a kid (probably in hopes of getting it autographed), he tossed it to a fan in the stands instead of returning it to his pitcher or an umpire – which ensured that an umpire would never see or touch the ball and realize it was not a game-used ball.

Click here to watch video of a postgame interview with Frazier that demonstrates he was aware from the very first that he had not caught the ball cleanly.  (You may need to unmute that video.)

Initially, Frazier thought the ball on the ground that he picked up and showed to the umpire was the actual foul ball – but as soon as he felt it, he knew it was not an official ball.

Rather than criticizing Frazier’s actions, most press accounts of the incident praised him for his quick thinking.  SI.com’s characterization of Frazier’s deception – “That’s gamesmanship at its finest” – is typical. 

Frazier certainly didn’t apologize for being a liar and a cheat:

It is Hollywood, so sometimes you have to act out a little bit. . . . It was one of those things where I think any third baseman or any player trying to win would do it. 

What do you expect from a Met like Frazier?

You might expect Major League Baseball to suspend or at least fine Frazier for his blatant cheating.  After all, the play took place in a game that had a direct impact on the pennant race.  (The game was 1-1 after eight innings, so every out mattered.  The Dodgers, who were in first place in their division by a half game, eventually lost and fell into second place as a result.)

But MLB officials never even considered punishing Frazier for cheating.  

God help you if you’re a baseball player and you fail a drug test.  (Test positive for steroids and you’ll be suspended for 80 games.  Test positive a second time and you’ll sit out one entire season – 162 games.)  

But the blatant deception of an umpire that directly affects the outcome of a game that might determine who makes the playoffs and who doesn’t isn’t even worth a slap on the wrist.

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The Todd Frazier story was completely overshadowed by what happened few days later in the U.S. Open women’s final match between Serena Williams (who has won no fewer than 23 Grand Slam singles titles) and 20-year-old Naomi Osaka – who was ranked as the only the 68th-best female player in the world at the beginning of 2018.

I’ll give you my take on the kerfuffle that erupted when Serena was penalized by the umpire for her very bad behavior in the next 2 or 3 lines.  

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Today’s featured song was released in 1972 on Big Star’s first studio album, #1 Record.

In a just world, Big Star would have been big stars, and #1 Record would have been a number-one record.

Alas, boys and girls, we don’t live in a just world . . . as the story of Todd Frazier proves.

Click here to hear “Don’t Lie to Me,” which was written by Big Star’s original guitarist, Chris Bell.  (Bell died in a car accident when he was only 27 years old.)

Click on the link below to buy today’s featured song from Amazon:

Animals – "Cheating" (1966)

Cheating!

I know you’ve been

Cheating!

Since I retired last year, I’ve been trying new things.

For example, when I woke up with the flu last Friday, I did something I’d never done before: I installed myself on the sofa and binge-watched an entire season of a television show in a single day.

It would have been too much to get through an entire season of a dramatic show with hour-long episodes in just one day – especially when I kept nodding off – so I binge-watched the first season of Master of None, a Netflix comedy series with half-hour-long episodes.

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Master of None stars Indian-American comedian Aziz Ansari as Dev Shah, an aspiring thirty-something actor who lives in an apartment in New York City and hangs out with an eccentric but lovable group of single friends.  (If you think that the show sounds like Seinfeld and Friends and Girls and Louie and numerous other old and new sitcoms, you’re right.)

The critics went absolutely ga-ga over Master of None.  The show is very funny at times but not so funny at other times.  In fact, it’s downright annoying at times.  

When I say Master of None is downright annoying at times, I really mean Aziz Ansari is downright annoying at times.  

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The Master of None episode titled “The Other Man” was by far the most interesting episode from the show’s first season.  First one thing, it starred Claire Danes.  For another, it starred Claire Danes.

Claire Danes

In “The Other Man,” Danes plays a well-known restaurant reviewer named Nina who starts talking to Dev at a party so she can avoid talking to some other guy.  One thing leads to another, and pretty soon Dev and Nina are back at her gorgeous Manhattan apartment, ready to get busy.

But they don’t get busy.  That’s because Dev notices a photograph of Nina with a handsome guy on a table near the sofa where they are making out.  She claims the guy is her brother, but Dev is suspicious – when he points out that she’s wearing a wedding dress in the photo, she fesses up and admits she is, in fact, married to the guy.  As a result, Dev decides not to have sex with Nina.

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The plot of “The Other Man” strained credulity.  We’re talking CLAIRE DANES here, boys and girls.  We’re supposed to believe that Dev would turned this woman down just because she’s married?  (Not a chance, dude.)

Danes and Ansari – in your dreams, dude

There was another problem as well.  I didn’t believe for a minute that the Claire Danes character would have been interested in the Aziz Ansari character.  Ansari is short and not particularly attractive, and his character is goofy and immature.  

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Not surprisingly, Dev begins to have second thoughts about his decision as soon as he leaves Nina’s  apartment.  

One of his friends – a lesbian who is much more of a sexual predator than the straight male characters in the show – tells him there was no reason for him to feel guilty about sleeping with Nina just because she’s married.  After all, she’s the one who’s cheating.  (Dev’s not only unmarried, but doesn’t even have a girlfriend).  Also, she and her husband don’t have children – in her view, sleeping with someone else’s wife isn’t a big deal, but sleeping with someone else’s mom is.  

Dev eventually comes around to his lesbian friend’s point of view, but only after he sees the husband acting like an entitled assh*le at a neighborhood ice cream shop.  Because the husband is a pr*ck, it’s OK to mess with him.  So Dev pays a booty call on Nina.

Claire Danes in “Homeland”

The script then jumps the shark.  Dev and Nina get caught by her husband.  He flips his lid, but so does she – the hubby has a little somethin’ somethin’ going on the side as well, and Nina calls him on his infidelity when she gets caught in the act.  

A month later Dev runs into the couple and learns that his getting caught with Nina by her husband has saved their marriage.  The incident caused the two to face their infidelity issues head on and work through them.  Now they are the happiest they’ve been since they were newlyweds.

In other words, Dev helped save a couple’s marriage by having sex with the wife.  (Really?)

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What’s the coolest thing about being the creator and the star of a successful TV series?  You have the ability to cast CLAIRE DANES on the show as a character who has the hots for your character.

I guarantee you that when Ansari cast Danes for the Nina role, he fantasized that Danes might be attracted to him and that something would happen between them off-camera.  (I’m sure he knew it was a long shot – probably an extremely long shot – but dum spiro, spero as they say in South Carolina.

And I also guarantee you that he wrote the episode the way he did in hopes of making a favorable impression on her.  First, his character turns her down when he finds out she is married – how noble is that!  Second, when Dev does have sex with Nina after all, that leads to Nina and her husband rekindling the spark of love that made them get married in the first place.  In other words, Dev’s getting caught having sex with a married woman saved her marriage.  

(Hey, it was worth a shot)

If you don’t think that Ansari was hoping against hope that his script would make Danes consider the possibility that having sex with him off camera would be a good thing for her real-life marriage, you don’t understand how the male mind works.

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“Cheating” – which was written by Eric Burton and Animals’ bassist Chas Chandler – was the B-side to the group’s 1966 hit, “Don’t Bring Me Down.”  Both songs were released on the Animals’ fourth American album, Animalization. 

Here’s “Cheating,” which plays during the closing credits of “The Other Man”:

Click below to buy the song from Amazon: