Ke$ha -- "TiK ToK" (2010)

I'm talkin' about everybody getting crunk
Boys try to touch my junk

Gonna smack him if he gets too drunk

It's St. Patrick's Day, which once must have had a legitimate reason for being, but which now is an excuse to engage in binge drinking.  (Not that binge drinkers really need an excuse.)

He's no amateur

I once had an Irish friend who was a big drinker.  (But I repeat myself).  He never went out drinking on March 17 -- he always said (with a sneer) that St. Patrick's was the day when all the amateurs went out drinking.

I not only don't go out drinking on St. Patrick's Day,  I am also careful not to wear green, lest people think I am Irish.

Speaking of binge drinking, I first wrote about Ke$ha a few months ago.  For my money, Ke$ha is the undisputed queen of drunken, trailer-trash pop stars.  

Ke$ha, queen of drunken, trailer-trash pop stars

Katy Perry?  Not even close.  

Britney Spears?  Yesterday's news.  (Britney does have a new hit out, and it may be the worst single I've heard played on the radio in years.  It's called "Hold It Against Me," and it's a play on the very old and very lame pickup line -- "If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?")

Britney and Katy: very trashy,
but no match for Ke$ha!

Ke$ha's songs are so unrelentingly sleazy that I have to believe she's just putting on an act.

(By the way, Ke$ha, girls don't have "junk." Boys have junk, but what girls have something very, very special that should not be referred to as "junk."  For those of you who aren't familiar with "crunk," it's a rap euphemism for getting drunk and high and generally effed up.)

Ke$ha ready for a night on the town

The lyrics to "TiK ToK" include what has become a notorious line about Ke$ha's dental hygiene practices:

Before I leave brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack

'Cuz when I leave for the night I ain't comin back

Ke$ha, before and after a bottle of Jack Daniels

Jack Daniels isn't the only thing she drinks, of course.  (I'm guessing water is the only thing she doesn't drink.)

Ain't got a care in world, but got plenty of beer

Ain't got no money in my pocket, but I'm already here

Ke$ha probably doesn't need to worry about being short of money to buy drinks.  I'm sure there are plenty of latter-day Sir Galahads out there who are happy to buy her drinks.

Binge drinking is a leitmotiv for Ke$ha.  (Fathers of daughters in their twenties may want to avoid exposure to Ke$ha's music.  You're going to want to lock them in their rooms, or send them to a convent, and neither of those options is going to go over very well with them.)  

Here are some lines from another Ke$ha hit, "Take It Off":

Got a water bottle full of whiskey

In my handbag

Got my drunk text on

I'll regret it in the mornin'

A few more lines from that song:

Now we're getting so smashed.

Knocking over trash cans.

Everybody breakin' bottles

It's a filthy hot mess

Ke$ha's destination in "Take It Off" is a place downtown "where the freaks all come around."  It's a "hole in the wall" and a "dirty free-for-all."  

To me, "hole in the wall" means a small place --  more likely than not, a hole in the wall is a dump.  

Some people have speculated that Ke$ha is talking about a club that has glory holes in its walls, but I really don't think that is the case.  (Let's not gild the lily.  Isn't this song sufficiently sleazy without bringing glory holes into the picture?)

In any event, it's clear that Ke$ha would have us believe that she drinks herself into oblivion seven nights a week (maybe eight).  I'm guessing that's an act.

I know that Rihanna is putting on an act in her new song, "S & M":

Feels so good being bad
There's no way I'm turning back
Now the pain is my pleasure . . .
Sticks and stones 
May break my bones
But chains and whips
Excite me



Rihanna

 "S & M" stands for "sadism and masochism," Rihanna.  It's not a game, and a bouncy little pop song is not really the appropriate musical vehicle to explore it.  This song is strictly poseurville . . . pretending to be into kinky stuff in order to sell downloads to teenagers.  Given that Rihanna's ex-boyfriend, Chris Brown, beat her up a couple of years ago, it's a little surprising that she would sing "pain is my pleasure," etc.

I heard Ke$ha a few weeks ago on "American Top 40."  That's the very popular syndicated radio show usually hosted by Ryan Seacrest, but he was gone on this particular Sunday morning and Ke$ha was sitting in for him.

Ke$ha didn't sound like the sharpest knife in the drawer that day.  She talked about her gal pal, Katy Perry, and how they were both starving musicians hanging out together in Los Angeles back in the day, waiting for their big break.  

She also talked about how she is a big fan of classic rock -- the Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin, etc. -- and likes to listen to it on vinyl.  (I think she was being honest about.  That part of the show sounded less like she was reading off a teleprompter than the other parts.)

Ke$ha with Seacrest

I sent the following text message to all four of my kids while I was driving around listening to Ke$ha -- "Ke$ha is hosting ATF [i.e., "American Top 40"] instead of Secrist [sic] on 99.5!!!"  I was so excited that I sort of lost my head, as my misspelling of Ryan Seacrest's name demonstrates.  

My 16-year-old son (who had once corrected my pronunciation of Ke$ha's name with more than a trace of scorn in his voice) texted me back as follows:

"You need psychological help.  Listen to old people music like you should."

I was thrilled to get that from him.  He has a rather short fuse at times, and his rants can be very funny.  

But then I noticed that he had added this at the end of the text: 

:-)

That kind of ruined it for me.  It's funny if he was serious, but not so funny if he was just kidding around.

Here's Ke$ha singing "TiK Tok":




Here's a pretty good parody of "Tik Tok":

Here is Ke$ha singing "Take It Off":

Here's a link you can use to buy "TiK ToK" on iTunes:

Click here if you prefer Amazon: