Gustaf – "Mine" (2020)

Hey, what you said?

It was mine!

I recently heard a radio ad for a new product designed to help nosebleed sufferers.  

It’s a small piece of compressed, medical-grade surgical foam that works by absorbing blood rapidly and expanding to provide gentle internal pressure when you stick it up your bleeding nostril.  

The sterile, hypoallergenic foam is infused with a topical clotting agent to help facilitate rapid clotting.  And it’s non-stick, so you can remove it without reopening the blood clot and causing the nosebleed to start again.

The product has the best name in the history of product names:

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Joshua Lippiner, the genius who came up with the Nampons name, appeared on Shark Tank earlier this year.  

Lippiner started his pitch by stating that 60 million Americans get nosebleeds.  He then demonstrated a couple of ways you could deal with their nosebleeds.  

First, you can stuff a tissue up your nose.

Another remedy for the problem – which Lippiner called “my personal favorite” – is to insert the business end of a tampon in the offending nostril:

Have you ever known anyone who put a tampon into his or her nose to stop a nosebleed?  NEITHER HAVE I!  

But you have to give credit to Lippiner for being willing to stuff a tampon halfway up his nose on national television and then stand there with the string hanging down.

In case you’re wondering, Lippiner’s pitch was successful – he left the show with a cool $350,000 in exchange for 10% of his company.

Click here to watch Lippiner’s pitch.

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I heard Gustaf’s “Mine” on an episode of the Netflix show, Shrill.  

According to their Wikipedia page, Gustaf is an art-punk band from Brooklyn.  “Mine,” which was released in 2020, was the group’s debut single.  

Click here to watch the official music video for “Mine.”

Click here to buy “Mine” from Amazon.