Scott Henderson – "Smelly Ol' Dog Blues" (1994)

Got a smelly ol' dog, baby
You know he's a smelly ol' hound

Scott Henderson is a jazz/blues guitarist who helped formed the progressive jazz fusion group, Tribal Tech, in 1984.

According to one source, Henderson has said on more than one occasion that he prefers to play with bands that do not have keyboard players because that allows him to "properly explore the guitar's full potential as an instrument."  

In other words, a guitarist can't compete with a good keyboard player and he knows it.

"Smelly Ol' Dog Blues" was released in 1994 on Dog Party, a blues album that features dog-themed songs like "Milk Bone," "Hell Bent Pup," and "Dog Walk."

I don't want to asperse Scott's dog, but it sounds like Scott needs to get him to an All Paws Pet Wash toot sweet.

A Jiffy Lube is a great location for a pet wash

All Paws Pet Wash – let's call the company "APPW" for short – sells coin-operated dog-washing kiosks designed to be sited at car washes, convenience stores, and so on.  

The company refers to its kiosks as pet wash stations, but I'm guessing 99% of its customers are dog owners.  If you tried to wash a cat at an APPW, I'm guessing it would claw the hell out of you and then run away, never to return.

I saw an APPW kiosk at a gas station/convenience store this summer:

Using an APPW isn't all that different from using a self-serve car wash.  First, you deposit five bucks, which buys you seven minutes to shampoo, condition, deodorize, rinse, and dry your canine buddy.  (I don't know about you, but I never finish the job at a self-serve car wash in the allotted time, and have to insert additional money.  I bet the same thing is true at an APPW.)

You start by lifting your dog into a shallow trough:

You use a rubber hose to wet him down, hit the "shampoo" button and use the hose to apply shampoo, rinse the dog off, apply conditioner, rinse the dog again, apply deodorizer, rinse the dog one more time, and then use the built-in vacuum/blowdryer to finish the job.

The instructions for use ask customers to "be nice to the next pet" and wash your dog's hair down the drain before leaving.  Ain't nobody got time fo' that!

My dog Lily is five or six years old, and I don't think she's had more than one or two baths in her life.  There's no real need to bathe a dog unless he or she has skin problems – or unless the dog gets too stinky for you.

Lily

If you'd like to get into the coin-operated, self-serve, pet-washing business, click here and you'll be taken to the All Paws Pet Wash website.

The APPW stations cost about $30,000.  But the company claims that you can make your money back in a year if you have an average of ten customers a day.

Here's "Smelly Ol' Dog Blues":

Click below to buy the song from Amazon: