Friday, October 23, 2015

Aaron Watson – "Deer Blind" (2012)

Well, that old game warden
He better steer clear
There ain't no poachin' goin' on up here

While visiting my parents in recently, I had occasion to visit the local Walmart store.

The typical Walmart is truly a garden of earthly delights, and the one in Joplin, Missouri, is no exception.  Given the season, it wasn't surprising that the store was well-stocked with pumpkins.  But I didn't expect to be given a choice between pumpkins from Texas and pumpkins from Oklahoma:

Texas pumpkins

Oklahoma pumpkins
I went to Walmart to buy groceries and a couple of potted mums for my mother.  But I love a bargain as much as the next guy, so I was sorely tempted when I saw a high-quality deer-hunting blind for sale for only $999:

To tell the truth, I had no intention of buying a deer blind at any price.  I've never gone hunting in my life, and wouldn't know the first thing about utilizing a deer blind.  (Even if I managed to kill a deer from my blind, I wouldn't have a clue what to do with the carcass.)

A couple of days later, I said good-bye to my parents and headed north on Interstate 49  My destination was the Kansas City airport.

Less than an hour north of Joplin is the town of Lamar, Missouri, which just happens to be the home of a major deer blind manufacturer.  (You can click here to read more about Lamar.)  

Lamar has a population of some 4500 souls.  So it was quite a blow to the town when O'Sullivan Industries, a large manufacturer of ready-to-assemble desks and bookcases, went bankrupt and laid off its 700 Lamar employees in 2007.

Three former O'Sullivan employees and a retired bank president joined forces the next year and formed Redneck Blinds, which manufactures several thousand deer blinds a year.  

If you plan to spend much time in a deer blind, you're going to need some beer, of course.  Busch hopes that its deer-themed 24-packs of beer will appeal to thirsty hunters:

You're also going to need something to eat.  Redneck's top-of-the-line deer blind doesn't come equipped with a stove or even a microwave, so I recommend that you visit another Lamar business, the Beef Jerky Outlet, and stock up before your next hunting trip.

If your tastebuds crave a change of pace from beef jerky, the Beef Jerky Outlet also offers turkey jerky (your choice of cherry-maple, honey-barbecue, and peppercorn smoked flavors), ham jerky, bacon jerky, buffalo jerky, venison jerky, and elk jerky.

Looking for a jerky with lots of healthy omega-3 fatty acids?  Try the salmon jerky (in your choice of pepper-garlic or teriyaki flavor).

The Beef Jerky Outlet is a family business that first opened its doors in 1961.  Believe it or not, some people thought that opening a beef jerky store was a crazy idea:

[Y]ou should have seen the looks on some of our relatives' faces when they heard what we were up to.  You should have seen the look on our BANKERS' faces when we pitched the idea to them.  Horror films have less tormented-looking faces in them than what we were looking at across the desk.

Oh ye relatives and bankers of little faith!  History has proved all of you doubting Thomases wrong!  

A happy jerky lover
The Beef Jerky Outlet's website sums it all up as follows:

[T]he long and the short of it is, we took a simple idea and added some fun.  We opened the doors and hoped you would come in.  And boy have you come.  Every day we are motivated to keep it going and keep making it better.  It’s all for you, the jerky lover who for too long was neglected and force fed inferior mass-market jerky.  We hope you enjoy it as much as we enjoy doing it for you.

Today's featured song (which is from Aaron Watson's 2012 album, Real Good Time)tells the tale of a gentleman who doesn't hunt deer from his deer blind.  Instead, he puts it to an entirely different use:

I got a different kind of hunting on my mind
Thank God I got my baby up in my deer blind

The deer blind I saw at Walmart didn't look like it was well-suited for a romantic rendezvous.  But if you can't afford a no-tell motel, a deer blind might be a better alternative than the back seat of a crew-cab pickup truck.

Here's "Deer Blind":

Click below to buy the song from Amazon:

No comments:

Post a Comment