Captain Sensible – "Wot" (1982)

 

When I woke up this morning 

I was feelin’ fine

Actually, that’s a lie.

I wasn’t feelin’ fine when I woke up this morning because today is my birthday, and birthdays are not really pleasant occasions for me any more.  

How old am I?  I’ll tell you how old I am.  I am exactly IT’S-NONE-OF-YOUR-F*CKING-BUSINESS years old!

*     *     *     *     *

There was another reason I wasn’t feeling fine when I woke up this morning:  

After dodging the bullet for over two years, I tested positive for the coronavirus on Sunday morning, and my symptoms – coughing, nasal congestion, night sweats, and general lassitude – kicked in shortly thereafter, making my Sunday night very unpleasant.

I’m fully vaccinated and doubly boosted – I got the second booster only a couple of months ago – but The Rona has laid me low regardless.

Doctors would say that while all those shots didn’t prevent me from contracting the Wuhan virus, they greatly reduced the risk that I would land in the ICU, or even die from what some young folks rather cruelly refer to as “The Boomer Reducer.”

Those same doctors would also tell me to suck it up and ignore my “Paxlovid mouth” – the foul metallic taste in my mouth that my antiviral pills are producing.

*     *     *     *     *

Captain Sensible’s 1982 hit single, “Wot,” tells the sad tale of a man whose slumber is disturbed when a jackhammer operator starts his daily work way too early.

Raymond Ian “Captain Sensible” Burns

I had a similar experience this morning.  My dog will happily lie on the floor and look out the front door for hours, but whenever someone walks by with his or her dog – this happens about every ten minutes – my dog starts barking his bloody head off.  

I react somewhat irrationally when I am awakened from a deep sleep – my brain is so befogged that there is no telling what I will do.  If my dog was a chihuahua or a Yorkie, I would probably have picked her up and thrown her into the next school district when she woke me up with her barking this morning.  

It’s lucky for my dog that she’s a yellow Lab and weighs about 60 pounds – I can’t even pick her up, much less throw her far enough away so that her barking won’t bother me.

Click here to listen to “Wot.”

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