Friday, January 27, 2012

Waka Flocka Flame (feat. Roscoe Dash and Wale) -- "No Hands" (2010)

Girl, drop it to the floor 
I love the way your booty go 
All I wanna do 
Is sit back and watch you move 
And I'll proceed to throw this cash

Jesus said, "For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them."  (That's Matthew 18:20 -- the King James Version.) 

2 or 3 lines says, "For where two or three rappers are gathered together, they are almost certainly in the midst of a strip club."

Yes, rappers and strippers go together like a horse and carriage.  If I had a dollar for every rap song set in a strip joint, I wouldn't be groveling for you to click on my ads.

Waka Flocka Flame
To me, one of the most interesting things about current-day hip-hop music is how many of the songs are collaborations involving two or three different MCs.  "No Hands" is credited to "Waka Flocka Flame (featuring Roscoe Dash and Wale)," which makes it sound like Waka Flocka is the primarily responsible for the song, with a little help from Roscoe and Wale.

In reality, each of the three contribute a verse, while Roscoe Dash handles the chorus (from which the lines quoted above are taken).  So why isn't "No Hands" credited to "Roscoe Dash (featuring Waka Flocka Flame and Wale)"?  Beats me.  

Waka Flocka's real name is Juaquin Bertholimule Malphurs.  He was born in Queens, but his family moved to Georgia when he was nine.  His mother is the CEO of an Atlanta-based management company whose client roster includes several other rappers.

Wale's real name is Olubowale Victor Akintimehin.  He was born in Washington, DC, to Nigerian parents who later moved to the Maryland suburbs.

Wale (which has two syllables -- "wah-lay") graduated from Quince Orchard High School in Gaithersburg, which isn't far from the world headquarters of 2 or 3 lines.  (I've even refereed basketball at good ol' Quince Orchard.)  

Roscoe Dash (whose parents know him as Jeffery Johnson, Jr.) was born in Little Rock but now lives in Atlanta.  He released a seven-song EP late last year, but has yet to release an album.  But if his work on "No Hands" is any indication, this boy is ready for the big time.

Check out Roscoe's hair, dude!
This song is pretty much what you'd expect from three young MCs rapping about going to a strip joint.  The lads do a lot of drinking and a lot of rainmaking.

In case you don't know -- although I doubt there are any 2 or 3 lines readers who are that clueless -- is when you pay tribute to a stripper by throwing a handful of paper money into the air so the bills flutter down on the stage where the stripper is "dancing."   The effect is like it's raining money.

Here are a few rhymes from "No Hands":

I'ma sip Moscato and you gonna lose them pants
And I'ma throw this money while you do it with no hands  (Roscoe)
DJ, this my favorite song
So I'ma make it thunderstorm
Flood warning! (Waka)
"Rain, rain go away" 
That's what all my haters say
My pockets stuck on overload 
My rain never evaporate (Roscoe)
I hope the ladies brought umbrellas, because it's exceptionally rainy in the club tonight!

Lil Wayne's about to make it rain!
I have to admit that one of Roscoe's rhymes puzzles me:
Them n*ggas tippin' good, girl 
But I can make you flush
'Cause I walk around with pockets 
That are bigger than my bus 

Roscoe's pockets are bigger than his bus?  What's up with that weak-ass rhyme, bro?

I won't bother explaining the rest of the strip-club slang in "No Hands."  You might get the wrong idea about me.  (I honestly can't remember the last time I was in a strip joint.  It was at least 30 years ago.)  Plus you've got Internet access -- you can look sh*t up just as easily as I can.

Here's the official video for "No Hands," which was not shot in a strip club.  The lyrics have been heavily censored.  (This video has been viewed over 45 million times, boys and girls.)

For my fellow First Amendment fans, here's an uncensored version of "No Hands."

And here's a video I came across when I was searching for the previous video.  (You'll be sorry . . .)

Here's a link you can use to buy the song from Amazon:

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