Friday, May 20, 2016

Foreigner – "Urgent" (1981)

That's why you call me 
In the middle of the night

I’m going to talk about my burgeoning friendship with hot young actor Tanner Kalina in just a moment.

But first we need to discuss a bra Groupon that I’m getting daily e-mails about.

I subscribe to Groupon, Living Social, and several other online deal-of-the-day marketers.  Each day, I get an e-mail from each one of them offering me discounts on local dining and drinking, travel, entertainment, health and beauty services, and so on.

For days now, I’ve been getting a Groupon offering me a “mystery bra deal” – a randomly selected set of six bras pulled from Groupon’s “vault of treasures.”  

The cost?  Only $19.99!  (That’s only $3.33 per bra – or only $1.67 per you-know-what!)

It seems like a good deal.  (Groupon says the value of the deal is $149, so $19.99 is a very significant discount from $149.)  But not for me, even though Groupon titles these e-mails “Recommended Deals Just for You.”  

You see, I’m a man.  And since I don’t suffer from gynecomastia – that’s “man boobs” to those of you who didn’t take three years of Latin in high school – I have very little need for bras.

I suppose I should keep a couple in a drawer just in case a female visitor to chez 2 or 3 lines forgets to pack one.  After all, I keep a spare toothbrush, some shampoo, and a bottle of aspirin in the guest bathroom for forgetful guests, so maybe having some extras bras around would be a good idea.

If I were a woman, would this Groupon “mystery bra deal” appeal to me?

I confess that I don’t know much about women’s attitudes towards bras.  I would think that most of you ladies are fairly picky when it comes to choosing your foundation garments, and wouldn’t want to buy your bras sight unseen – even if you could save a few bucks.  But I could be wrong.

Richard Linklater, a hot chick, and Tanner Kalina
at the "Everybody Wants Some!!" premiere
Which brings me to Tanner Kalina, the young actor whose performance in the new Richard Linklater movie, Everybody Wants Some!!, is the talk of the town.  (I have to think he is up to his neck in hot chicks these days.)

You can click to read my 2 or 3 lines post about that very appealing movie, which is my favorite comedy of the year by a wide margin.  

Somehow, Tanner saw my tweet about that post and hit the “like” button.  You bet that caught my attention.  After all, it’s not every day that a future Brad Pitt says something nice about 2 or 3 lines.

Tanner Kalina in "Everybody Wants Some!!"
I followed up my post about Everybody Wants Some!! with one about Linklater’s 1993 movie, Dazed and Confused.  When I tweeted about that post, I mentioned Tanner’s name in the tweet, hoping to reel in this very large celebrity fish.

It worked – Tanner “liked” that tweet as well!

I figure there’s more than enough flattery in this post to get Tanner to follow 2 or 3 lines on Twitter.  But if he doesn’t, you can best believe I’ll keep kissing up to him until he does.

Young Mr. Kalina plays Brumley, one of the freshman baseball players who is shown the ropes by his older teammates when he arrives at college the weekend before fall classes begin.

In this scene, Brumley learns the proper way to apply cologne as today’s featured song plays on the soundtrack:

Kalina was well-qualified for his Everybody Wants Some!! role.  He was a three-year starter and two-time all-district selection at Jesuit College Prep high school in Dallas, and went on to play Division I baseball at Houston Baptist University. 

* * * * *

“Urgent” was a #1 hit for Foreigner in the summer of 1981.

In other words, Richard Linklater screwed up by including it on the Everybody Wants Some!! soundtrack, because that movie takes place almost a year prior to the release of “Urgent.”

By the way, the saxophone solo on “Urgent” is performed by Motown great Jr. Walker (of Jr. Walker and the All Stars fame).

Foreigner's Lou Gramm
Lead singer Lou Gramm had a really bad perm when this song was recorded.  (So did I.)

Here’s “Urgent,” which is a really bad song.  

Click below to buy the song from Amazon:

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