5th Dimension – "Up, Up and Away" (1967)

We can sing a song

And sail along the silver sky

For we can fly! 

When Apollo 11 astronaut Neil Armstrong became the first man to set foot on the surface of the moon, he described his feat as “one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind.”

By contrast, the recent flight of Blue Origin’s New Shepard spacecraft might be described as one small step backwards for feminism and one giant ego trip for the six women – including pop megastar Katy Perry – who were aboard that rocket for the ten-minute round trip to “outer space.”

“Space is going to finally be glam,” Perry told Elle magazine before the flight.  “We are going to put the ‘ass’ in astronaut!” 

*     *     *     *     *

One of Perry’s fellow passengers on the New Shepard was CBS Mornings co-host Gayle King, who is notoriously afraid of flying but who overcame her fears through meditation and prayer.  “I’m so proud of me,” she crowed after returning to terra firma.   

King’s bestie Oprah Winfrey travelled to Texas to witness the New Shepard’s flight.  “We've been friends [for almost] 50 years . . .  and I've never been more proud of my friend than today,” Oprah said.  “This is bigger than just going to space. I mean, I think for her, who, anytime we're on a flight, she's in anybody's lap if there's the slightest bit of turbulence, as like real-world anxiety flying.  And this is overcoming a wall of fear, a barrier.  I think it's going to be cathartic in so many ways for her.”

BFFs Oprah and Gayle

After conquering her fear of flying, King is ready to tackle another of her phobias.  “I might now get my ears pierced,” she said after the flight.  “I’ve always been afraid.”

*     *     *     *     *

Glamour magazine broke some really important news about the New Shepard mission:

All six women had blow-outs for the flight and were dressed in matching Blue Origin-branded jumpsuits that were cinched at the waist and included the option for a slight flare leg thanks to a slim zipper.  The skintight suits were made for the voyage by the fashion brand Monse, which took a 3D scan of each passenger’s body for the perfect fit.

“Simplicity was important, and comfort, and fit,” said one of designers of jumpsuits. “But we also wanted something that was a little dangerous, like a motocross outfit.  Or a ski suit.  Flattering and sexy.”

Lauren Sanchez – who is best known for being Jeff Bezos’s side piece before becoming his fiancée – told Glamour that she was would be wearing Skims under her jumpsuit.  Skims is the underwear line owned by Sanchez’s friend Kim Kardashian.  (Kim was unable to attend the launch, but Kris Jenner and Kim’s sister Khloe were there.)

We at 2 or 3 lines have been unable to confirm a report that Sanchez was chosen for the mission so that the effects of weightlessness on plastic surgery could be tested:

*     *     *     *     *

It’s no surprise that “Up, Up and Away” won a record five Grammy awards in 1968 (including the big one – Record of the Year).

After all, it was written by Jimmy Webb, who gave us “Wichita Lineman” (which Bob Dylan famously said was the greatest song ever written) and “MacArthur Park” (which 2 or 3 lines famously said was the greatest song ever written).  

And it was recorded by the 5th Dimension – who were the ne plus ultra of pop vocal groups – backed up by drummer Hal Blaine, keyboardist Larry Knechtel, guitarist Tommy Tedesco, and other members of the legendary group of session musicians who became known as the “Wrecking Crew.”

Click here to listen to “Up, Up and Away.”

Click here if you want to buy that recording from Amazon.  But before you do, ask yourself if Jeff Bezos already has too much money.  

Rolling Stones – "Down Home Girl" (1965)

And every time I kiss you, girl

It tastes like pork and beans

It’s been a long time since I’ve eaten pork and beans, but the dish used to be a regular part of my diet.  

Only Van Camp’s pork and beans would do – I eschewed other brands.

Pork and beans right out of the can were a perfect accompaniment for hamburgers or ham sandwiches.

But after a long night drinking 3.2% beer in Kansas, I wanted more.  So I would dump a can of Van Camp’s finest into a saucepan, add a couple of cut-up hot dogs, grated cheese, ketchup, and garlic salt, and heat the whole mess up.

I’d grab a couple of slices of white sandwich bread and a Dr. Pepper, and eat every bite of my concoction in front of the TV.

Mmmmm . . .

*     *     *     *     *

I recently learned that Van Camp’s pork and beans have a long and honorable history.

In 1861, Gilbert Courtland Van Camp and his wife Hester moved to Indianapolis, where Gilbert got into the wholesale grocery business.  Hester came up with a recipe for pork and beans with tomato sauce.  Gilbert decided to can Hester’s dish and sell it to local grocery stores.  

Shortly thereafter, Van Camp signed a contract to supply canned pork and beans to the Union Army.  Van Camp’s business was relatively small, and one researcher has speculated that he sold pork and beans only to Camp Morton, an army training site located in Indianapolis, rather than supplying the entire Union Army.) 

Note that the current Van Camp’s pork and beans label claims that the product has been “satisfying families since 1861.”

*     *     *     *     *

“Down Home Girl” was co-written by the legendary Jerry Leiber – who teamed with Mike Stoller to write most of Elvis Presley’s early hits– and the not-so-legendary Artie Butler.  (You’ve never heard of Butler, but he was a well-known Brill Building session pianist and arranger.  His many arranging credits include Neil Diamond’s “Cherry, Cherry,” Paul Revere and the Raiders’ “Indian Reservation,” Vicki Lawrence’s “The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia,” Barry Manilow’s “Copacabana,” and Louis Armstrong’s “What a Wonderful World.”)

The Rolling Stones cover of “Down Home Girl” was released on their second studio album (The Rolling Stones No. 2) in 1965.

It’s hard to picture Mick Jagger having anything to do with a girl who tastes like pork and beans.  But baked beans are part of a traditional full  English breakfast, so maybe that would have been a big turn-on.

Click here to listen to “Down Home Girl.”

Click here to buy it from Amazon.

Rosalind Russell and Edie Adams – "Ohio" (1953)

Why, oh why, oh why oh

Why did I ever leave Ohio?

I read Nathanael West’s The Day of the Locust when I was in college . . . but that was a l-o-n-g time ago.

I don’t remember much about that book.  So I had no clue how to answer the following question when it popped up at trivia earlier this week:

“What enduring animated TV character shares his first and last name with one of the main characters in the 1939 novel, The Day of the Locust?”

None of my teammates had ever heard of that book, much less read it.  So it looked like we were in trouble.

*     *     *     *     *

Nathanael West, the author of The Day of the Locust, was born Nathan Weinstein in New York City in 1903.

West dropped out of high school but managed to get admitted to Tufts College (now Tufts University) by presenting a forged high school diploma.

After Tufts got wise to West and expelled him, he got into Brown University by appropriating the transcript of his cousin, a Tufts student who was also named Nathan Weinstein. 

According to his biographer, West did little schoolwork at Brown but read extensively.  I bet he would have been a good trivia player.

*     *     *     *     *

Speaking of trivia . . .

We ended up turning in “Homer Simpson” as our answer to the question posed above.  

The first episode of The Simpsons aired in 1989, so Homer certainly qualified as an enduring character.  Of course, you could say the same about Bart Simpson.  

My team thought about going with Simpson fils instead of Simpson père as our answer, but we couldn’t decide whether to refer to him as “Bart” or “Bartholomew.”  (Our trivia host is a pretty picky guy.)

Homer Simpson at work

In the end, we stuck with Homer – and that turned out to be the right choice.  Winner, winner, chicken dinner!

(Here are some of our other correct answers from that night: Enola Gay, DeLorean, Tom Selleck, Tampa Bay Rays, Y is for Yesterday, 1984, Carli Lloyd, Napster, and La Paz.)

*     *     *     *     *

In The Day of the Locust, Homer Simpson is a bookkeeper from Iowa whose doctor advised him to move to California for his health.  

Homer has been described as a “soft-mannered, sexually repressed, and socially ill-at-ease” man whose inner torment is manifested through the seemingly uncontrollable movements of his unnaturally large hands.

Matt Groening, the creator of The Simpsons, told an interviewer in 2012 why he chose to name his protagonist after The Day of the Locust character.  “Homer was my father's name,” Groening said, “and I thought Simpson was a funny name in that it had the word ‘simp’ in it, which is short for ‘simpleton’ – I just went with it.”

*     *     *     *     *

The Day of the Locust is set in Hollywood, and most of the book’s characters other than Homer Simpson work in the movie industry.  

Nathanael West knew that industry well.  He had been employed as a screenwriter by several Hollywood studios, and his wife Eileen was Walt Disney’s executive assistant.

A year after The Day of the Locust was published, West and his wife died in an automobile collision resulting from his failure to stop at a stop sign. 

Coincidentally, West’s friend and fellow novelist-cum-screenwriter F. Scott Fitzgerald had died from a heart attack the day before.

Eileen’s body was cremated and her ashes placed in her husband’s coffin for burial.  I wonder if their family chose to do it that way so they only had to pay for one cemetery space instead of two.

*     *     *     *     *

The Wests died just a few days before they were scheduled to fly to New York City to attend the opening night of My Sister Eileen, a play that was based on autobiographical short stories written by Eileen’s sister Ruth.  

In those stories – and in the play based on them – Ruth and Eileen are sisters who move from Ohio to New York City to seek fame and fortune.  (Older sister Ruth wants to be a writer while younger sister Eileen is an aspiring actress.) 

My Sister Eileen was very successful – it ran for 864 performances, and was made into a 1942 movie starring Rosalind Russell.  

My Sister Eileen also inspired the 1953 musical Wonderful Town – which won five Tony Awards (including Best Musical).  

My Sister Eileen is also the title of a 1955 musical comedy film that’s based on the original play, but doesn’t use the music from Wonderful Town.  (Harry Cohn, the head of Columbia Pictures, had wanted to make a movie version of Wonderful Town, but couldn’t agree on a price for the film rights for the musical.  So he had a new score written and ordered other changes to avoid running afoul of the copyright laws.) 

Last but not least, My Sister Eileen was turned into a sitcom that aired during the 1960-61 season on CBS.

*     *     *     *     *

Ruth and Eileen didn’t have it easy when they upped stakes and moved to New York City.  In today’s featured song from Act One of Wonderful Town, the sisters wonder if it would have been better for them if they had stayed in Ohio.

Click here to listen to the original cast recording of “Ohio,” with Rosalind Russell as Ruth and Edie Adams as Eileen.  (If you don’t know who Edie Adams is, click here to watch her singing “Big Spender” on behalf of Muriel cigars.)

Click here to buy “Ohio” from Amazon.