I left my job with the Federal Trade Commission on Friday, April 13, 1991, and headed for the airport early the next morning to fly to Los Angeles and monitor an infomercial shoot on behalf of my new employer. After 13 1/2 years as a government attorney, I was entering a new world -- and my first three-day trip to Los Angeles was very strange indeed.
To sell car wax on TV, you
simply must set the car on fire
My new employer was a NYSE-listed infomercial producer and direct-response marketing company that went out of business many years ago. During the three years I worked for that company, I probably attended 50 infomercial shoots -- the products featured included exercise equipment, kitchen gadgets, car-care products, skin-care and hair-care products, collectible dolls, better-golf aids, and fishing lures.
Chuck and Christie
The celebrities and ex-celebrities who hosted or appeared in the shows ranged from Olympic gold medalists like Bruce Jenner and Mark Spitz to television stars like Jaclyn Smith and Chuck Norris.
Some of those infomercials were shot on location, but most were created in nondescript television studios in places like Burbank, CA and Fairfield, NJ.
Most of my trips were to Los Angeles, and I eventually got to know my way around L.A. -- especially the Burbank-North Hollywood-Glendale area -- as well as I knew my way around Washington, where I had lived since graduating from law school.
The Jenners
I had my favorite neighborhood restaurants and even had a favorite radio station -- KROQ-FM, or "K-Rock," a Burbank alternative station that helped launch the careers of local bands like the Offspring and the Red Hot Chili Peppers. In the pre-Internet era, KROQ was the place you went to discover new bands.
KROQ was also the station where the Loveline program got its start. Loveline started as a low-rated Sunday-night-only call-in show that focused on questions about romance and sex, but eventually grew into a five-night-a-week syndicated radio and television show featuring Dr. Drew Pinsky (an addiction medicine specialist who also hosts the Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew show on VH1) and comedian Adam Carolla (who went on to host The Man Show and Crank Yankers).
Loveline got some fairly titillating calls -- it was sort of the radio equivalent of the "Letters to Penthouse" section of Penthouse magazine -- but I hated it when Loveline was on KROQ instead of music.
Loveline's Dr. Drew Pinsky, Adam Carolla
There are a handful of songs that I will always associate with all those trips to Los Angeles 20 years ago. One I remember vividly is "3 Strange Days" by the one-hit wonders, School of Fish.
School of Fish was a Los Angeles band that formed in 1989 and released an eponymous debut album in 1991. (You can't go out looking to post about songs that were on eponymous albums -- you have to let them come to you.) "3 Strange Days" was their first single. The group released a follow-up album in 1993, but it didn't sell well. They broke up shortly thereafter.
Here's "3 Strange Days":
Click here if you'd like to buy this song from Amazon:
Are you surprised to see me posting on consecutive days instead of following my usual three-posts-a-week schedule?
Surely you haven't forgotten that 2 or 3 lines celebrates February -- the shortest and most depressing month of the year -- by doing "29 Posts in 28 Days"? Actually, because it's a leap year, we're doing "29 Posts in 29 Days" this year.
Not a good movie
(You're very welcome -- but please stop clinging to my ankles and kissing my feet and shouting loud "Hosannas" . . . you're embarrassing me!)
Yes, I know you don't deserve this much first-rate bloggery. Most of you forget to read 2 or 3 lines unless I remind you, never respond to my solicitations of guest posts, and -- worst of all -- never click on my ads. But I'll forgive you if you promise to do better in the future.
Does anyone listen to Joe Jackson's music any more?
Joe Jackson
Jackson is best known in the United States for his first single, "Is She Really Going Out With Him?" He released two albums in 1979 (Look Sharp! and I'm the Man) and another one in 1980 (Beat Crazy) -- each one stronger than the one it succeeded.
After recording Jumpin' Jive in 1981 -- it was a collection of covers of classic 1940's swing and "jump blues" songs originally performed by Cab Calloway, Louis Jordan and others of that ilk -- he released another album of original songs, Night and Day, the following year.
"Breaking Us In Two" is from that album, which made it to the top five in both the United States and the UK. Jackson is a keyboard player, and his first three albums depended much less on guitars than most rock/pop records. Night and Day doesn't use guitars at all -- the instrumentation is sort of Billy Joel-ish, but Jackson is a far superior songwriter.
Jackson is often compared to Elvis Costello (who is also English and only 14 days younger). Both started out doing a clever and quirky brand of pop. Their music seemed straightforward enough, although it was more sophisticated than it first appeared.
Elvis Costello
But it was the words that made both Jackson's and Costello's songs memorable. They wrote sad songs and happy songs and happy/sad songs, but their lyrics were consistently interesting and original.
Jackson and Costello each worked their way through a number of musical genres as their careers progressed. Both released jazz albums and recorded with classical musicians. I like their oldest albums the best, but I give them credit for not being content to recycle their early hits for 30 years like so many musicians from that era. Elvis and Joe never got stuck in the oldies/classic-rock time warp.
I like Costello a lot, but I think Jackson's songs deserve just as much respect. This is not one of my very favorite Jackson songs, but it's the obvious choice for today's post. If you haven't figured out why that is, I'm sure it will all become clear to you in anohter day or two.
Here's "Breaking Us In Two." (The music video is very dated looking and a little clichéd. Focus on the music.)
Click here if you'd like to buy this song from Amazon:
I was planning to write about Three Dog Night's huge 1969 hit, "One," to kick off this year's "29 Songs in 29 Days" series.
But then I remembered that I had already written about that song back in July 2010. Of course, I could probably post about a song I covered last week without anyone noticing -- but that's not the way 2 or 3 lines rolls.
So then I decided to post about Harry Nilsson's version of "One" -- Nilsson wrote the Three Dog Night hit and his recording of it is very interesting. But I had included the Nilsson "One" in the Three Dog Night post, so nix to that.
Metallica did a song titled "One" on its 1988 album, And Justice For All, so that was a possibility. But that song is about a soldier who lost his arms, legs, eyes, mouth, nose and ears in an explosion, but whose mind functions perfectly.
I watched the Metallica video for the song (which contains footage from the 1971 movie, Johnny Got His Gun, which is based on the 1939 Dalton Trumbo novel that inspired the Metallica song) -- I may have nightmares for the rest of my life.
That left me with "Number One," by the Rutles. The Rutles were a fictitious British Invasion-style rock group created by Eric Idle and Neil Innes of Monty Python for a TV comedy sketch.
The Rutles came to my attention in 1978 when NBC aired the Rutles' mock documentary, All You Need Is Cash, in the SNL time slot one Saturday night.
While there was a lot of disagreement over which heavy-metal band inspired the This Is Spinal Tap "mockumentary" (which was released several years after All You Need Is Cash) there was never any doubt that the Rutles were intended to parody the Beatles.
"The Rutles" LP
Many of the Rutles' songs -- a 14-song LP was released at the same time the mockumentary aired -- were stunningly Beatles-ish. Some of them were arguably better than the Beatles songs they most resembled.
Like most Rutles songs, "Number One" is not based solely on one Beatles song. I suppose the Fab Four song it most resembles is "Twist and Shout," but it includes bits and pieces of other early Beatles songs.
Here's an excerpt from All You Need Is Cash that features "Number One":
That's all for now, boys and girls, but don't forget to check back tomorrow for a groovy new post. In case you weren't around last February, you should know that it's the tradition here at 2 or 3 lines to ramp it up and post every single day in February. Santa brought me a 30-day supply of amphetamines, so I'm prepared to stay up for the whole damn month if that's what it takes to do "29 Songs in 29 Days" right. (That's a fact, Jack!)
Here's "Number One" in its entirety:
Here's a link you can click on to order "Number One" from Amazon:
Today is January 31, so tomorrow is the first day of February -- and that means the 2012 model of "29 Posts in 29 Days" makes its debut in a mere 24 hours.
I see you shivering with antici- . . . -pation!
But 2 or 3 lines would be amiss if it didn't feature a football-themed song before getting all wrapped up in the extravagant, fanciful, and elaborate construction that is "29 Posts in 29 Days." After all, it's Super Bowl week!
Country-western music seems to be the preferred genre of football fans -- Faith Hill does the NBC Sunday Night Football theme song, a Big & Rich track is featured on ESPN's College Gameday, and Monday Night Football kicked off for years with a Hank Williams Jr., song. (Last fall, ESPN dropped the Williams song after Hank Jr. dropped a rather odd reference to Hitler while talking about President Obama and House Speaker Boehner playing golf together.)
But while basketball would probably rank as the favorite sport of rappers, there are a lot of football references in hip-hop songs.
Just one year ago, Lil Wayne was getting a lot of attention with his song "Green and Yellow," which was released just before last year's Packers-Steelers Super Bowl. "Green and Yellow" is a spoof of Wiz Khalifa's huge hit, "Black and Yellow," which pays tribute to the sports teams of that Pittsburgh native's hometown. (Black and gold are the colors of the Steelers, the Pirates, and the Penguins.)
Lil Wayne is a New Orleans native, but is proud to be a cheesehead:
Yeah, uh-huh, you know what it is
I'm a cheesehead, y'all n*ggas Cheez Whiz
Pittsburgh Steelers, that's nothin'
That Super Bowl ring, that's stuntin'
Lil Wayne at Super Bowl XLV
Next Weezy takes on the beloved Steeler "Terrible Towel" -- a rally towel created in 1975 by the late Myron Cope, who was the radio voice of the Steelers for 35 years
This is Green Bay -- bitch, we go hard
This is Packer Country, where's your green card?
Terrible towels, that sh*t's borin'
We got the ball, you know we scorin'
In the last verse of "Green and Yellow," Lil Wayne continues to hammer on the Steelers. He even belittles the team's legendary "Steel Curtain" front four, which helped Pittsburgh win four Super Bowls in six seasons in the late 1970s. He plans to smoke a big cigar to celebrate the Packers' victory, but his cigar will be filled with "Amsterdam" -- a euphemism for marijuana.
Big Gs on the helmet
Steel Curtain? What is that, velvet?
And if we win, I'ma throw a Super Bowl party
And blow a cigar like Vince Lombardi
I'm in Wisconsin, smoking Amsterdam
Yeah I'm from New Orleans, but I been a Packers fan
We knocked the Eagles and the Falcons and the Bears off
Now we 'bout to cut Troy Polamalu's hair off
I haven't heard any comparable Super Bowl-themed hip-hop songs this year. Surely there are rappers out there who are fans of the Giants and the Patriots.
No one team appears to be the clear favorite of the hip-hop community -- a lot of NFL teams have rappers as loyal fans. For example, Ice Cube is a Raiders loyalist, while Brooklyn native Jay-Z roots for the Jets and Snoop Dogg (a Los Angeles native) is a Steelers fan.
But rappers do appear to have a favorite NFL player: Randy Moss, the phenomenally talented but badly behaved wide receiver who retired from the NFL before the 2011 season. (Since no NFL team wanted to touch him with a ten-foot pole at that point in his career, it was a good time to retire.)
My personal favorite Randy Moss rap song is Outkast's Grammy-winning "The Whole World" (2002). These lines are from the verse contributed by Outkast collaborator, Killer Mike, who compares his ability to catch a musical beat to Randy Moss's ability to catch a football without breaking stride:
Glitter, glisten, gloss, floss
I catch a beat running like Randy Moss
"The Whole World" is a delightful little ditty -- even those of you who claim not to like rap music will enjoy it -- and the official music video is very cool:
If you are a fan of today's NFL but are old enough to remember watching the Dolphins, Cowboys, Steelers, and Vikings powerhouses of the 1970s, you'll appreciate the lines quoted at the beginning of today's post, which are taken from the veteran New York City rapper Masta Ace's 2009 song, "Ei8ht is Enuff."
Let me quote those lines once more for your convenience:
When it's time to get wild on the stage
I can spit eights like Lynn Swann, Alan Page,
Or maybe Randy Moss is his college days
When he was goin' through that childish phase
Masta Ace can certainly "spit eights" (which refers to his gift for rapping in eight-measure or eight-line verses). But what is the significance of his mentioning NFL stars Lynn Swann (the Hall of Fame wide receiver for the Steelers who ran for governor in Pennsylvania in 2006 but lost), Alan Page (a Hall of Fame defensive lineman for the Vikings who is now an associate justice on the Minnesota Supreme Court), and Randy Moss (who should be in the Hall of Fame someday, but whose checkered legal history and infamous pseudo-"mooning" of the crowd in a 2005 NFL playoff game will probably prevent him from pursuing a career in politics or on the bench)?
Randy Moss pretending
to moon Packers fans
It's really quite simple. Swann and Page both wore jersey number 88 in the NFL, while Moss wore number 88 when he played college football at Marshall University.
Perhaps the ultimate football-related rap song is "Queen's Gambit" (2005) by the rapper GZA, who was one of the founders of the legendary hip-hop collective, the Wu-Tang Clan.
"Queen's Gambit" refers to 31 of the 32 current NFL football teams. Most of the references are obvious, but some are a little tricky -- GZA is not above using a homonym or a near-homonym for a few of the team names. Let's see if you can figure out the 31 that are mentioned in this rap. If you can, you'll be able to deduce which team is not mentioned.
I'll even give you the lyrics to help you out:
She dated jolly green giants that flew on jets
An A-list actress, who was never walked off sets
She loved stuffed animals, especially bears
Was a role model, like a cardinal to our peers
A patriotic tomboy, like Mary Ellen from The Waltons
A former lifeguard, who had the skills of a dolphin
When I met her, she was in drama school and wore bengals
Drove a Bronco, and she was far from star-spangled
Had basic skills, and worked part time in mills
Raised buffalos, cause she was behind them bills
Had a man who always roared like lion
A domestic violent cat, tackled the girl and kept her crying
Couldn't care, she was losing her hair, from depression
She was in the air, and there was some room for interceptions
I told her to stay strong, not to be ashamed
You're a ten, I see, you just need to tighten your game
Her ancestors were chiefs, who ran with running deer
On the sail with the seahawks, who battled the buccaneers
The redskin garments was suede coatliners
Held rare coins frequently sought from gold miners
They were hard-working warriors, we call overtimers
Shot plenty arrows at cowboys and 49ers
Her interesting background but quite unusual
Great for a script but out of bounds for a musical
She told me to call her if I came to town
I started textin' her soon as my plane had touched down
Holding my luggage in the hand that revealed the bad scars
She pulled up at arrivals, driving the Jaguar
Her brown skin was soft, her legs beautifully shaven
Her house was fly, sitting on the roof was a raven
As we entered, I heard laughter
She walked into a large living room, I went after her
There was two of her girlfriends playing chess like they were Vikings
Militant as panthers, their resemblance was striking
Had on thongs, high heels, and belts that was garter
Energized like phones that just came off the charger
I introduced myself to gain yardage
'Cause anything less than smooth would have been straight-up garbage
The shorter one met me when I had a SkyPager
Thought I rolled with robbers, stealers and panty raiders
She took fruit from the orange bowl, it was in season
One of them said she loved the juice and kept squeezing
I knew that I was gonna get wined and dined
It would have been a penalty not to pass the scrimmage line
Now I laid back and relaxed, waiting for the kick-off
One removed the lip gloss like she was bout to lick all
She caressed me with fingertips soft as velvet
Dying for me to pack her as she stroked my helmet
And I was thinking these girls was saints
But it was first and ten, and there was extra walls to paint
Before you know it, I had all three in a huddle
Buckin' like a colt before I released them puddles
They spread eagles like wide receivers
As I ram them in the endzone, and they became true believers
(Hmmm . . . I don't think "Queen's Gambit" will end up as the Monday Night Football theme song.)
Here's "Ei8ht Is Enuff." Note that Masta Ace, who hails from New York City, is wearing a Yankees hat. His collaborator, Boston native Ed O.G., is sporting a Red Sox cap. Perhaps it's not too much of a leap to presume which team each will be rooting for on Sunday?
Some of you may prefer this version of "Eight Is Enough":
Here's a link you can use to buy "Ei8ht Is Enuff" from Amazon:
What sets Lil Wayne apart from other rappers is his joie de vivre -- is there anyone in the world of hip-hop who enjoys his work more?
"Right Above It," which was a top 10 hit for Lil Wayne in 2010, features the dazzling wordplay that is characteristic of his raps. You think you can listen to this song once and figure it out? all the Fuhgeddaboutit, dude -- he's like a hummingbird, flitting from one pun and allusion and double entendre to another.
Here's a YouTube video of "Right Above It" that gives you the lyrics. I suggest that you listen to the song, following along with the lyrics as you listen, before we go any further.
Let's talk about just a few of the lines from "Right Above It."
In the first verse -- which is performed by Weezy's label mate and protégé, Drake, who's a pretty big deal in the world of hip-hop right now -- we learn that Drake is a fan of the movie Slumdog Millionaire:
This that "Slumdog Millionaire" Bollywood flow
My real friends never hear it from me
Fake friends write the wrong answers on the mirror for me
Drake
Drake then waxes existential about our essential alienation from our fellow man:
We walk the same path
But got on different shoes
Live in the same building
But we got different views
A little later, we learn that Drake either prefers married women to single women, thinks that two chicks are better than one, or thinks that two married women are better than one -- or all of the above.
Don't like my women single
I like my chicks in twos
But Drake's verse is just a warmup for the main event. When Lil Wayne takes over the microphone, all hell breaks loose lyrically:
Guns turn you boys into pussies: sex change
(Lil Wayne shows his disdain for his enemies by calling them "boys" instead of "men." He then belittles their masculinity even further. "Pussy" has multiple meanings, of course. It is slang for the female genitalia, and also slang for a coward. Pulling a gun on a man may "unman" him -- in other words, cause him to act like a woman. It's as if he has undergone a sex-change operation. Of course, a gun can also be utilized to perform a sex-change operation in a more literal sense. But let's not go there.)
Skinny pants and some Vans
Call me Triple-A, get my advance in advance, Amen
Lil Wayne in Vans
(Most rappers don't go for tight jeans and skateboarder shoes, but the look works for Lil Wayne. If he was a corporate bond, Lil Wayne would undoubtedly be rated AAA -- he's sitting on a lot of cash -- but the triple-A reference here may relate to his practice of insisting that concert promoters give him his advance in advance, which minimizes any ugly money squabbles later. Amen!)
Life is a beach, I'm just playin' in the sand
(You've no doubt heard the old line, "Life is a bitch -- and then you marry one." Life is a beach -- not a bitch -- for young Mr. Carter.)
I'm on a paper trail and ain't no tellin' where it took me
And I ain't a killer, but don't push me
Lil Wayne
(Paper Trail is the title of T.I.'s 2008 album, and Lil Wayne was featured on a hit single from that album. Actually, we can tell exactly "where it took me" -- both Lil Wayne and T.I. went to prison after Paper Trail's release. "I ain't a killer, but don't push me" is a line from Tupac Shakur's "Hail Mary.")
I can hand it to Drake or do a quarterback draw
Wildcat offense, check the paw prints
(Lil Wayne knows a little about football, it seems. Not surprisingly, he's the quarterback of the team.)
Damn where you stumbled at?
From where they make gumbo at?
(They make gumbo in New Orleans, of course, and Weezy is proud to be from NOLA.)
Kane got the beat
Jumpin' like a jumpin' jack
And you know me
I get on this bitch and have a heart attack
(Lil Wayne acknowledges his producer, Kane Beatz, who also produced "Bottoms Up" by Trey Songz -- which was featured on 2 or 3 lines a few days ago.Wayne jumps on Kane's beat and works himself into a frenzy -- his frantic and energetic performing style resembles the writhing of a man suffering a heart attack while he is having sex.)
President Carter, Young Money Democrat
(Lil Wayne's real last name is Carter -- and he is the founder and former president of his record label, Young Money Entertainment.)
Jesus said, "For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them." (That's Matthew 18:20 -- the King James Version.)
2 or 3 lines says, "For where two or three rappers are gathered together, they are almost certainly in the midst of a strip club."
Yes, rappers and strippers go together like a horse and carriage. If I had a dollar for every rap song set in a strip joint, I wouldn't be groveling for you to click on my ads.
Waka Flocka Flame
To me, one of the most interesting things about current-day hip-hop music is how many of the songs are collaborations involving two or three different MCs. "No Hands" is credited to "Waka Flocka Flame (featuring Roscoe Dash and Wale)," which makes it sound like Waka Flocka is the primarily responsible for the song, with a little help from Roscoe and Wale.
In reality, each of the three contribute a verse, while Roscoe Dash handles the chorus (from which the lines quoted above are taken). So why isn't "No Hands" credited to "Roscoe Dash (featuring Waka Flocka Flame and Wale)"? Beats me.
Waka Flocka's real name is Juaquin Bertholimule Malphurs. He was born in Queens, but his family moved to Georgia when he was nine. His mother is the CEO of an Atlanta-based management company whose client roster includes several other rappers.
Wale
Wale's real name is Olubowale Victor Akintimehin. He was born in Washington, DC, to Nigerian parents who later moved to the Maryland suburbs.
Wale (which has two syllables -- "wah-lay") graduated from Quince Orchard High School in Gaithersburg, which isn't far from the world headquarters of 2 or 3 lines. (I've even refereed basketball at good ol' Quince Orchard.)
Roscoe Dash (whose parents know him as Jeffery Johnson, Jr.) was born in Little Rock but now lives in Atlanta. He released a seven-song EP late last year, but has yet to release an album. But if his work on "No Hands" is any indication, this boy is ready for the big time.
Check out Roscoe's hair, dude!
This song is pretty much what you'd expect from three young MCs rapping about going to a strip joint. The lads do a lot of drinking and a lot of rainmaking.
In case you don't know -- although I doubt there are any 2 or 3 lines readers who are that clueless -- is when you pay tribute to a stripper by throwing a handful of paper money into the air so the bills flutter down on the stage where the stripper is "dancing." The effect is like it's raining money.
Here are a few rhymes from "No Hands":
I'ma sip Moscato and you gonna lose them pants
And I'ma throw this money while you do it with no hands (Roscoe)
DJ, this my favorite song
So I'ma make it thunderstorm
Flood warning! (Waka)
"Rain, rain go away"
That's what all my haters say
My pockets stuck on overload
My rain never evaporate (Roscoe)
I hope the ladies brought umbrellas, because it's exceptionally rainy in the club tonight!
Lil Wayne's about to make it rain!
I have to admit that one of Roscoe's rhymes puzzles me:
Them n*ggas tippin' good, girl
But I can make you flush
'Cause I walk around with pockets
That are bigger than my bus
Roscoe's pockets are bigger than his bus? What's up with that weak-ass rhyme, bro?
I won't bother explaining the rest of the strip-club slang in "No Hands." You might get the wrong idea about me. (I honestly can't remember the last time I was in a strip joint. It was at least 30 years ago.) Plus you've got Internet access -- you can look sh*t up just as easily as I can.
Here's the official video for "No Hands," which was not shot in a strip club. The lyrics have been heavily censored. (This video has been viewed over 45 million times, boys and girls.)
For my fellow First Amendment fans, here's an uncensored version of "No Hands."
And here's a video I came across when I was searching for the previous video. (You'll be sorry . . .)
Here's a link you can use to buy the song from Amazon:
It's only a few more days until 2 or 3 lines kicks off what has become an eagerly-awaited February tradition: "29 Posts in 29 Days." (Most years, it's 28 days, of course-- but this is a leap year.)
Right now, you're probably feeling a bit like Tony and Maria did in West Side Story -- the minutes seem like hours . . . the hours go so slowly . . . and still the calendar says January!
Our last few January posts are going to feature several of the best rap songs from 2010 -- I meant to write about all of them last year, but time has a way of getting away from me sometimes.
The first 2 or 3 lines post after "29 Posts in 29 Days" will feature the absolutely, positively best hip-hop track from 2011 -- let's see if any of you can correctly guess what it's going to be.
Trey Songz
"Bottoms Up" was a monster hit by Trey Songz. It's a pretty generic hip-hop song about a good-looking guy with lots of money (his sobriquet for himself is "Mr. Steal Yo' Girl") who has gone to a club in search of young lovelies.
Like a Boy Scout, Trey's motto is "Be prepared" -- he's prepared with sufficient cash to get those babes drunk out of their minds.
Bottoms up, bottoms up
Pocket full of green
Girl, you know I love the way
You shake it in them jeans
Yes, Trey loves the way the hotties in the club shake it in them jeans, but he likes it even more when they are shaking it sans them jeans.
What elevates "Bottoms Up" into the top echelon of recent rap songs is the presence of Nicki Minaj, who is making a habit out of absolutely stealing the show whenever she contributes a verse to another star's song. That is exactly what she does here.
The chorus of "Bottoms Up" begins with these lines:
Bottoms up, bottoms up
Hey, what's in your cup?
Got a couple of bottles
But a couple ain't enough
Nicki Minaj in
"Bottoms Up"
That turns out to be the understatement of the century when Mr. Steal Yo' Girl runs into a platinum-blonde Nicki at the club. They are a match made in . . . well, certainly not heaven. (Maybe the other place?) He's shallow and self-centered and really, really drunk, and so is she.
In the first lines of the verse she contributes to "Bottoms Up" (which are quoted at the beginning of this post), Nicki asks for a rather pricey alcohol smörgåsbord: Patrón tequila ($52.95 a bottle and up), Rémy Martin cognac ($31.99 for the VSOP), Hennessy cognac ($49.95 for the VSOP), and last but certainly not least, Dom Pérignon Rosé champagne ($300 and up, depending on the vintage).
Nicki's a very busy women, so she doesn't waste a lot of time when she goes to a club -- she gets right down to business when a potential suitor approaches her:
I don't say "Hi"
I say "Keys to the Benz?"
Nicki's verse ends with some very odd lines about the late Anna Nicole Smith:
Yellin' all around the world
Do you hear me?
Do you like my body?
Anna Nicki
Rest in peace to Anna Nicole Smith
Yes, my dear, you're so explosive
Say hi to Mary, Mary and Joseph
Now bottoms up
And double my doses!
The "Do you like my body?" line is a reference to the late Anna Nicole Smith's appearance on the "American Music Awards" television broadcast in 2004, when she threw up her hands and asked the audience, "Like my body?" Her slurred speech and bizarre behavior led to speculation that she was under the influence of some kind of drugs -- perhaps prescription painkillers.
Here's Anna Nicole's appearance. I'm guessing someone doubled her doses earlier that evening:
Here's the official music video for "Bottoms Up." (Almost 54 million views!) Nikki's verse begins at 2:43 of the video, and I don't blame you a bit if you skip ahead to that point in the video -- that woman is a force of nature, boys and girls.
Here's a link you can use to order "Bottoms Up" from Amazon:
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