Black Crowes – "Remedy" (1992)

I need a remedy

For what is ailing me

One picture is worth a thousand words – or so they say.

2 or 3 lines usually opts for the thousand-word option.  But today, I’m going with a couple of pictures instead:

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I’ve had six COVID vaccinations.  I got my most recent shot less than two months ago.

Nonetheless, I tested positive for the second time today.  (I had COVID in 2022 as well.)

To quote Robot Model B-9, “THAT DOES NOT COMPUTE!”

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I heard today’s featured record on the Sirius/XM “Underground Garage” while I was lolling around my C-suite apartment at 2 or 3 Lines World Headquarters.   

I featured it in 2012 and 2021, but it’s too perfect a record not to use again.

Click here to listen to “Remedy.”

Click here to buy the song from Amazon.

City Boy – "Goodbye, Blue Monday" (1976)

Goodbye, blue Monday

No one to drag me out of bed

When you’re retired, there’s no such thing as “blue Monday.”  There’s just plain Monday . . . which is no different than Tuesday . . . or Wednesday . . . or any other day.

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Earlier this month, I wrote about Frank Ryan and King Hill, the two men who split time at quarterback on Rice University’s 1957 Southwest Conference championship football team.  Both men went on to have long careers in the NFL.

I graduated from Rice many years after Hill and Ryan played.  I remember seeing them play on TV back in the sixties, when I was a kid who would watch just about any sporting event that was televised.  (We only had two television channels in my hometown back then, so my choices were very limited.)

Frank Ryan was the more successful NFL QB, but King Hill got most of the playing time when both men were at Rice.  Hill was so good for the Owls that he was the consensus first-team All-American quarterback that year and the #1 overall pick in the 1958 NFL draft.  

Hill also captained the college team in the 1958 College All-Star Football Classic.  Most of you have probably never heard of the College All-Star Football Classic, which was first played in 1934 and last contested in 1976.  I’ll not only tell you more about that game in the next 2 or 3 lines, but also explain the curious connection between it and the annual Joplin, Missouri “Sidewalk Sale.”

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The opponent of the collegians in the 1958 College All-Star Football Classic contest were the Detroit Lions, the defending NFL champions.  Coincidentally, the Lions were also quarterbacked by a former Rice player, Tobin Rote, who played professionally from 1950 until 1966.

Rote had led Rice to a 10-1 record and the SWC title in 1949.  The Owls closed out that season with a win over North Carolina in the Cotton Bowl.  

Tobin Rote as a Packer

Green Bay used their second-round pick to draft Rote in 1950, and immediately installed him as their starting QB.  The hapless Packers failed to achieve a single winning season during Rote’s seven-year tenure with the team, but he was certainly not the problem.  Not only did Rote rank third in the NFL in passing touchdowns during his years in Green Bay – only Hall of Famers Norm Van Brocklin and Bobby Layne had more – but he also led all NFL QBs in rushing.

Rote had a remarkable 1956 season for the 4-8 Packers.  He led the NFL in passing yards and passing touchdowns that year, and also topped all other quarterbacks in rushing yards and rushing touchdowns.  The Packers scored 34 TDs that year, and Rote either threw or ran for 29 of them – a total that remains the record for a 12-game NFL season.  

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God only knows why the Packers traded Rote – who was clearly their most valuable player – to the Detroit Lions after his incredible 1956 season.  

Rote as a Lion

The Lions’ decision to trade for Rote was almost as puzzling.  After all, they already had a great quarterback in Bobby Layne, a future Hall of Famer who had led Detroit to two NFL championships.  

The Lions’ strategy seemed to be prescient when Layne broke his ankle in the penultimate game of the regular season.  Rote led his team to victories in their last two regular-season games, then brought them back from a 27-7 deficit to prevail over the 49ers in the Western Conference playoff, 31-27.

Detroit’s opponents in the NFL title game that year were the powerful Cleveland Browns, who had appeared in ten of the previous eleven league championship matchups.  In one of the greatest playoff performances in NFL history, Rote threw four TD passes and ran for another score as the Lions dominated Cleveland, 59-14.

If you watched the Lions-Rams playoff game earlier this month, you probably heard the announcers talking about the 89-year-old Detroit fan who had owned season tickets to the team’s games for 66 years.  His first year as a season-ticket holder was that 1957 season, when Rote led the team to its most recent NFL title.

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In 1960, Rote moved from the NFL to the Canadian Football League.  In the first of his three seasons with the Toronto Argonauts, he threw for 38 touchdowns, which was the most ever by a CFL QB.  But after the 1962 season, Rote was on the move again – this time to the upstart American Football League San Diego Chargers.

Rote as a Charger

The Chargers had won only four games in 1962.  But with Rote at the helm of their league-leading offense, the team finished 11-3 and crushed the Boston Patriots 51-10 in the AFL Championship game.  The 35-year-old Rote was named the league’s Most Valuable Player.

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Rote hung up his cleats after the 1964 season.  He came back briefly with the Broncos in 1966, then quit for good.

Tobin Rote remains the only quarterback to lead teams to both the NFL and AFL championships.  He threw for over 200 TD passes in his pro career, but might have been a better runner than passer – at the time of his retirement, no NFL QB had rushed for more yards in a career.

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I heard about City Boy when I was in law school, and liked their first album enough to buy their next two.

Today’s featured song was released on their second LP, Dinner at the Ritz.  Here’s what the New Musical Express said about that album:

Not even the highest ballyhoo of praise could do justice to City Boy's masterwork, Dinner At The Ritz . . . You hear a composing style which has been influenced by, respectfully, Lennon and McCartney, novelist Ian Fleming, and Noel Coward.  Very English . . . but very strange. 

I don’t think Lennon and McCartney influenced Dinner at the Ritz much if at all.  City Boy’s very sophisticated and clever lyrics and somewhat theatrical music are much more reminiscent of their contemporaries 10cc and Sparks than the Beatles.

Click here to listen to “Goodbye Blue Monday.”

Click here to buy the record from Amazon.

Deee-Lite – "Groove Is in the Heart' (1990)

Your groove I do deeply dig

No walls, only the bridge

My supper dish, my succotash wish

I am a very successful trivia player, but I freely admit that a higher power is responsible for much of my success.

As you probably know, the University of Michigan’s football team – coached by Jim Harbaugh – is this year’s national championship.  One of our trivia questions this week asked who was the Michigan football coach when the team last won the national championship.

That very morning, I had finalized a 2 or 3 lines post about Tom Brady and the late Frank Ryan – a couple of men who became outstanding NFL quarterbacks after spending a good part of their college football careers sitting on the bench.

Here’s the first sentence of that post:

During his very successful 13-year stint as the head football coach at the University of Michigan, Lloyd Carr’s teams won five Big Ten titles and the 1997 national championship.  

I wasn’t 100% sure that Michigan hadn’t finished atop the college football rankings sometime between Carr’s 1997 title and Harbaugh’s 2023 championship.  But as I recalled, the period after Carr’s retirement and before Harbaugh’s ascension to the head coaching job had been a dry spell for the Wolverines.  So I felt pretty safe in answering “Lloyd Carr” to the trivia question.

If that question had been asked at the previous week’s trivia contest, there is NO WAY I would have come up with the right answer.  (Lloyd who?)

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It was at least a million-to-one shot that I would not only choose to write a 2 or 3 lines post that mentioned Lloyd Carr and the fact that one of his University of Michigan football teams had won a national championship, but also that I would do that less than 24 hours before my team was asked to answer a question about Carr’s accomplishment.  

Lloyd Carr

In other words, it was one hell of a coincidence – if it was a coincidence at all.

Some people don’t believe in coincidences.  For example, Albert Einstein famously said that “Coincidence is God’s way of remaining anonymous.”

The great Russian author Vladimir Nabokov saw the world a bit differently:

A certain man once lost a diamond cufflink in the wide blue sea, and twenty years later, on the exact day, a Friday apparently, he was eating a large fish . . . but there was no diamond inside.

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I think I heard today’s featured record back in the nineties, but it had fallen off my radar until I heard it recently while watching an episode of Big Mouth on Netflix.

If you haven’t seen Big Mouth, it’s a remarkably vulgar and offensive animated series.  Netflix wouldn’t dare air a live-action show about middle schoolers that was as explicit and filthy as Big Mouth is, but the rules are apparently very different for animated shows.  (In one scene, two 13-year-olds kiss and dry hump each other until the boy makes a mess in his pants – said mess-in-pants being very plainly depicted.)

The brains behind Deee-Lite was Lady Miss Kier (née Kierin Magenta Kirby in Youngstown, Ohio, in 1963).  “Groove Is in the Heart” – which made it all the way to the #4 spot on the Billboard “Hot 100” – also featured Parliament-Funkadelic’s Bootsy Collins and A Tribe Called Quest’s Q-Tip.

Click here to watch the official music video of “Groove Is in the Heart.”  (The slide whistle is m-o-n-e-y!)

Click here to buy the record from Amazon. 

Shadows of Knight – "Someone Like Me" (1967)

I’m not changing my suggestion 

You need someone just like me

During his very successful 13-year stint as the head football coach at the University of Michigan, Lloyd Carr’s teams won five Big Ten titles and the 1997 national championship.  As a result, he was inducted into the College Football Hall of Fame after he retired.

But Lloyd Carr let Tom Brady sit on the bench for his first two seasons at Michigan.  And even when Brady was a senior, Carr failed to discern Brady’s greatness, choosing to platoon him at quarterback with sophomore Drew Henson for the first seven games of the season.

Tom Brady, riding the pines at Michigan

Carr wasn’t the only distinguished coach to underestimate Brady’s ability.  Bill Belichick kept Brady on the New England bench his rookie year, and he might have remained there for years if Patriots QB Drew Bledsoe hadn’t suffered a serious injury early the next season.

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Like Brady, the late Frank Ryan struggled to persuade both his college and NFL coaches that he deserved to be a starting quarterback.  

Ryan and King Hill split playing time fairly evenly in 1956, when both were juniors at Rice University.  But Hill was the dominant member of Rice’s QB tandem in 1957 – Ryan took only about a third of the snaps for the Owls that year.

Given how good King Hill was, you might wonder how Ryan got even that much playing time.  Hill was not only the consensus first-team All-American quarterback that year, but also the #1 overall pick in the 1958 NFL draft.

Ryan was surprised to be drafted in the fifth round by the Los Angeles Rams – he had assumed his football days were over, and was planning to pursue a graduate degree in mathematics at his alma mater.  He started only a few games in his first four years in the league.  

Frank Ryan rarely started for the Rams

The Cleveland Browns thought Ryan would be a good backup, and traded for him before the 1962 season.  But their first-string QB was injured halfway through the season, giving Ryan the opportunity to be a starter that he had been waiting for.  

No other NFL signal caller – not Johnny Unitas, not Bart Starr, not Fran Tarkenton, not Sonny Jurgensen – threw for more touchdowns than Ryan did during the years that he was the Browns’ starting QB.  He led the team to five consecutive winning seasons and the 1964 NFL championship, and played in three Pro Bowls.

(Scroll down to read more about Frank Ryan, who was an accomplished mathematician as well as a star quarterback.)

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You may be wondering whatever happened to King Hill, the All-American who beat out Ryan for the starting spot at Rice when both were seniors.

Hill had only modest success as a professional quarterback – due in part to the fact that he spent virtually all of his career on the rosters of some very bad teams – but don’t let that make you think he wasn’t a remarkable athlete.

While he was at Rice, Hill not only was an All-American QB but also an outstanding punter and a defensive back.  In 1957, he almost single-handedly led the Owls to a 7-6 upset win over #1 ranked Texas A&M.  

King Hill

Hill not only scored Rice’s only TD, he kicked the extra point, intercepted a pair of passes, and kept the heavily favored Aggies pinned deep in their own end of the field with well-placed punts.  (Hill was his team’s primary punter during most of his NFL seasons.)

“I have been saying all season that King Hill was a great athlete,” A&M’s legendary head coach Paul “Bear” Bryant said after the game. “He made me look good on Saturday, but I wish he hadn’t.  He did everything but take up tickets.”

Hill wasn’t just a gridiron star in college.  He also played basketball and golf while at Rice, making him one of the last three-sport lettermen in major college athletics.

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Like Frank Ryan, King Hill was more than just an athlete.  Highly respected by his peers, he was a key figure in the formation of the NFL Players Association, helping to negotiate the first collective bargaining agreement between NFL players and owners.  

After retiring as a player, Hill spent the next nine years as an Houston Oilers assistant coach before moving to New Orleans, where he was the Saints’ offensive coordinator for five seasons.  The Philadelphia Eagles then hired him as their scouting director, a position he held for seven years.

Hill loved golf, and helped promote a number of charity golf tournaments after retiring from coaching.  Among the causes he supported were the Ronald McDonald Houses and the Special Olympics.

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The Rolling Stones, Animals, and Yardbirds were English bands who started out playing Chicago-style blues songs.

The Shadows of Knight – who are best known for their 1965 cover of Them’s “Gloria” – were a Chicago band that sounded like they were a British group playing Chicago-style blues.

“Someone Like Me” is a non-album single they released in 1967 that failed to chart.  The record works despite being a hot mess – if I didn’t know better, I’d swear that the lyrics and the music were written by two different people who never met each other.

Click here to listen to “Someone Like Me.”

Click here to buy the record from Amazon.